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Love

Posted at 1:52 PM on January 11, 2009 by Vera Schabicki

When I held my new born baby in my arms the feeling I had was pure, powerful unconditional love. So often people speak and write about love, how it consumes some people, how it guides and inspires people. The world we live in is often hard and unloving, injustice is something that is especially poignant and sad in the eyes of children. Then there is the personal effort to live in love, my words are often harsh, my gaze judgemental, my attitude resentful. And when I see the success and happiness of other people I often feel jealous and inferior rather than happy and inspired...............what a strange construct the human mind and heart are. The most consistent way of expressing love for me is through food......We have a lot of big parties with tons of kids running around, every night we sit together and eat.....it is not that pretty, often we bicker, there is often a fair amount of vulgar humor, but we have had many serious discussions about life, politics, drugs, relationships.....on and on. I have often suggested to people that we have seperate dinners, since Scott comes home so late at night, but the kids have consistenly and vehemently refused this option, they would not miss the time together even though it is often pretty stressful. I think hard about the food that goes into my childrens bodies, I want something that is doing no harm, so that means it must be organic.......this is not hurting the environment, it is less damaging to people working on the land and it is more nutritious.....great......We eat animal flesh that comes from happy free chickens and cows and pigs......milk and eggs from the same happy animals......the challenge of Locavorism added more complexities, is food from a factory organic farm any better than Purdue chicken.....(I was so angry and hurt and upset when I read the section about Rosies organic chicken in The Omnivores Dilemna). But strangely enough the Locavore experieince is still more love.......when we drink milk we know that the cows that gave it are not just well treated but loved and respected, the chickens we get our eggs from are named and adored, the vegetables and fruits are tended with thoughtfulness and care. When we eat we can name the person who grew many of the things or at least the place from which it came. The issues of money and time are such tough nuts in so many of our lives. We are not a wealthy family (well, I guess in context of the worlds standards we are very, very wealthy). One good income for seven (now six people) can not be thoughtlessly spent. We have health insurance, but twenty percent of cancer and asthma and mental illness puts us squarely in the camp of people that have health care related debt. Yet it is never a question that the highest priority is food, good tasting happy, healthy food.(I joke that we eat organic rather than buy clothes or take vactions). Cooking every night can be a exhausting, It is much easier to be creative when you are cooking for one or two easily pleased people....then the creative juices can really flow, whereas cooking for a large mix of young picky eaters is a bit of a pain. I can easily appreciate why people get prepared foods or eat in fast food restaurants. I think many people are very, very tired. I am inspired by Gina having a job and three young children and still making time to feed her family healthy food a priority. I am amazed that I vicarioulsy know Autumn,some one who can harvest maple syrup and changes cooking appliances the way some people change wardrobes, that I have met a person that in one year can accomplish the stunning amount of things that Donna has done, what commitment, ingenuity and hard work. I am priveleged to know someone like Cher who has gone through many difficult sounding things this year but always brings a deep thoughtful caring to her blogs......and Paulette with her descriptions of approaching things realistically, creatively and with such a rich access to resources and information....and the thought that some one like April could get a Phd, have a baby and move, while still Loacavoring is, to me, unbelievable. (I could go on but I am feeling so HARRIED).

I have loved being a Locavore. I have enjoyed getting to know my fellow Locavores through their entries. I have learned so much and been so inspired by the kindess, innovation and commitment of these fine people, I will miss being part of this group. I have appreciated the comments and advice I have received in response to my posts and the expressions of friendship. I WILL try to put in an electric fence, plant another garden, learn more about permaculture and other organic gardenings...I will make more of an effort to learn more about the foods offered by my community. I will continue to learn to be loving. I am feeling harried so I must go......imperfectly but with very great love and affection for my fellow locavore travelers, the people I have gotten to know this past year in my community and my wonderful friends in the Unschoolers of Memphis group and, of course my family.

With Very best regards, Vera