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January 15, 2008 | 7 Comments

Mr. Keillor,
I really miss many of the great sponsors from the past. Will you ever resurrect such greats as Raw Bits, Bertha's Kitty Boutique, Bigger Hammer Hardware, Worst-Case Scenarios and Ralph's Pretty Good Grocery? I know I wouldn't qualify for Raw Bits, but my son is a good kid and might do so someday, and it would be wonderful to hear some new (or old!) spots for those great sponsors.


What can I say? Writing comedy isn't carpentry and there comes a day when you sit down to write humorously about cats and you simply can't do it. So you don't. You move on. Some things prove durable and others don't. We live with uncertainty. But your memory is better than mine, Steve. I had forgotten all about Raw Bits, (Listen) and now I can't quite remember what the premise was. Bertha's has returned now and then. Worst Case Scenarios sort of transmogrified into Bebopareebop Rhubarb Pie. Ralph's is still in Lake Wobegon. Bigger Hammer? Are you sure that was on our show?


Bigger Hammer Enterprises... I remember it but not well enough to recite the slogan. The basic premise was the same as one of the ground rules that was posted on the bulletin board in the laboratory I worked in as a novice: "If it won't move, force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway."

Oh sure! It was Bigger Hammer Enterprises as I recall and it was about '84 or so? It was maybe during the Dept. Of Folk Songs era? Remember "Robot Cricket Laser" with onboard printer port and carcass count software? That may have been a one off. Or how about Fritz electronics?
You triggered a load of memories. My wife and I still sing,
"People use your heads,
You can't do as you please.
How are you gonna get through life
if you don't have the sense Go gave geese?"
Or the poem about winter in St. Paul that contained a rhyme that would make Shakespeare slap his cheek and say OH MAN... Genius!:
"There were no bar or stores to go ta,
But I was not surprised 'cause I'm from Minnesota"
One day I'll drag out the old reel to reel and play these for the kids. Please don't post this, it's just an old guy remembering what little he can.

A listener since the early, early days and I too am unable to remember Bigger Hammer Hardware..But I do remember Ahooah (sp?) Hot Sauce..come to think of it Cafe De Burph (sp again..this is radio after all.) hasn't been on in a few months....

It was Bigger Hammer Enterprises. The slogan was, "If you are going to do a job yourself, sooner or later you're going to need a Bigger Hammer."

I had a Raw Bits tee shirt that I wore until it was more air than cloth.

"Raw Bits. Oat hulls and wheat chaff. It's not for everybody. Send your name to the Raw Bits selection committee, and we'll let you know if you qualify. Raw Bits." Two guitar notes.

As a computer programmer, the Raw Bits T-shirt had an important secondary meaning to me. I really wish you'd reprint these; I think you'd sell quite a few...

I miss the jingle: "Bob's Bank, it's in the little green mobile home at the end of Main Street..." where the slogan is "Neither a borrower or a lender be."

I had a Raw Bits t-shirt, and a PowderMilk Biscuits T-shirt as well. I wore them until they fell apart. Then my wife threw them away. She didn't know any better. Please reprint these I would buy some for sure.

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