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Garrison, How much loot does

March 24, 2004 |

How much loot does Guy Noir get from his clients? The great Jim Rockford got $200 a day and expenses (sometimes) and other private eyes got by on a few bucks, a few shots of the old redeye and some leggy dame. Does Guy get the girl, the bucks or the shaft?

--Tom Lawrence

He doesn't get the girl and usually he doesn't get the bucks. Guy is not good at closing a deal and signing a contract. He spends a lot of time fending off clients he doesn't want (lost cats, a search for a missing punchline, etc.) and some time chasing unavailable babes and then, of course, a good deal of time brooding. I am going to have to get him a $200 job just to prove that he can do it.

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