From the Joke Collection
He had had enough of the bachelor life. He went to his pastor and asked what to do to attract a wife.
For weeks later, his neighbors became worried as he was often seen in his fields gesticulating and talking at his John Deer.
One neighbor timidly approached him and said, "We know that you are worried about finding your bride, but have you gone crazy? What're you doing out here?"
"Well, Father said that if I wanted to marry, I would have to talk to a tractor." ”
—KURT SWENSON, DECATUR, Georgia